My biggest lesson was that these loops were mostly endings. Endings that were way overdue. Endings that were simply clearances to make way for this New Moon in Leo. It's a powerful one for beginnings, which is why the endings were so powerful as well. Housecleaning needed to be done, and Leo wasn't going to let me/us get away with procrastination any longer.
There are some relationships that last a lifetime. One that's lasted for over a decade for me has been the relationship I have with my BFF, Snowy. She's taught me so much about friendship, love and trusting my own gender. She's the perfect friend for me.
We don't have to converse on the phone or online every day. Neither of us is much of a telephone-talker (probably from our Call Center Industry days), but, if one of us needs the other, everything else drops and that person is a priority.. and, we both know that about each other. I don't think twice, and neither does she- we KNOW that we're there for each other. She calls me on my bs, and I do the same for her. All done in love, but it's the truth between us that breeds the trust.
We know that it will always be this way, and we cherish that about each other. That's the whole point to the last F in BFF.. forever.
I have friends that I already know will be there for a very long time as well. They are authentic, sassy, intelligent, fun, supportive, kind and caring. I'm honored and blessed to know them, and to have them in my life. They know how to be themselves, and we all celebrate our individual uniqueness that contributes to the whole of our group.
There are some relationships that don't last long with me. I recently had a friendship end with someone because this person admitted, "I had to change everything about myself to fit in with you and your friends". At first, I was shocked, then angry, and then the anger quickly turned to pity. Because, it really is just very sad that someone felt a need to do that.
If you put on a mask to fit in, then you don't belong with the people you're so desperately trying to impress. Be who you are, and find those who will celebrate the authenticity of who you are. If you never show the real you, then you're going to be miserable and make those around you miserable.
Because eventually, that mask slips and everyone sees you aren't who you claimed to be. People feel betrayed. You feel betrayed... but, it's because you betrayed yourself, not because the group you were in did anything to cause that. The one hurt the most is the person who lied to everyone, including him/herself.
It doesn't matter whether you fit into a specific group. What matters is that you can live with yourself, every day, knowing you are being the best and truest you. My daughter found a meme that says, "Be yourself. Everyone else is taken." It's a painful lesson to learn, and I hope someday this person finds his/her genuine self and can attach to others with whom he/she can share and celebrate those similarities.
In the end, I believe it's all for the highest good that this came out. I don't want fake friends, "yes" people, or carbon copies in my life. I want to celebrate the differences and quirks and unique abilities and talents that each of my friends has. This "friendship" needed to end, so I could appreciate those veritable companions and soul-mates in my life more fully.
There are projects that sometimes need a swift kick in the pants and a house-cleaning in order for them to move to a new level. I experienced that as well over the past couple of weeks. An incident took place that might have completely devastated a large community service project that several of us were working on.
Instead of letting it get us down, it motivated us to work harder, to clean it up, and to move forward. The community rallied around, and it became even bigger and better than we thought it could be. The challenge of that incident was just what we needed to clean house and start a new, even better, beginning.
The challenges weren't without pain. They weren't easy to to process, and those who were injured in the pain of rebirth still need some time to completely heal. Much like cleaning out an infected wound, there is pain that brings a wave of relief once it's been cleansed. The healing then begins, and new, stronger skin forms. Yes, there is a scar there, but that's just an extra few layers of tissue to protect from re-injury... and battle scars always have a good story to them :)
So, while it was a rough time getting to this point, the New Moon is just about here. And, I'm really excited about the gifts and new experiences She's about to bring. The house is clean, everything is in order and plans are set. I'm welcoming this New Moon with excitement and a focus on the future.
If you've experienced this too, I wish you a really happy, success-filled, joyful and exciting new phase in your life as well.
Sláinte,
Kallan